Men’s Work at the Pace of Integration

In my approach to growth and healing in men’s work, I don’t guide us towards dramatic, cathartic experiences but towards inner and relational presence with what is here. When we bring our witnessing presence to what seems stuck, frozen, or fragmented, the potency of Life is already moving at its own perfect pace toward fuller expressions of wholeness. That pace may be quite varied from man to man. Each group also reveals a collective pace through coherence.
​
Sometimes, the organic healing process of Life in the moment may come with a big, strong, and loud burst of emotion. Most often, in my experience, when we’re cultivating a field of presence saturated in loving awareness, the pace of integrating fragmentation is slow and gentle in its powerful unfolding.
​
That’s not to say I don’t love a good roaring expression of fierce love among men, whether expressed through grief, anger, or any other combination of the beautiful palette of emotional expression available to us in our relational artistry. Our fierce, heart-connected clarity is needed and can be deeply trustable when brought forth from a conscious and rooted presence.
​
I also honor that there are moments when the body needs to spontaneously rage, scream, and wail in its pain and sense of separation from Love, and I welcome these expressions in my groups when they arise. But in most circumstances, I don’t endorse intentionally teasing out or pushing for cathartic release experiences in men’s work. I see it doing more harm than good in the longer arc of growth and healing.
​
Let’s welcome our rewilding, yes! Let’s tap into our experiences of power and primal energy with purpose. And let’s be kind to our sacred bodies and minds (and each other) as we do so. Let’s cultivate attunement with authenticity, sensitivity with strength, and awareness with truth. While a gentler, sometimes slower approach may not be as externally exciting, enticing, or marketable as other approaches, it leads to more sustainable processes of remembering our wholeness and embodying an integrated manhood.
​
Men, if you’d like a space of brotherhood where we practice attunement with Life and move together at the pace of integration, you’re invited to join us online for Rooted Presence: A Men’s Circle.

Coming soon in person to Basel as well.